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SONGS OF THE YEAR

2010-12-31T05:24:00.011+08:00

The list of the best songs of 2010 is here! Better late than never, right? It should be noted that songs should be released as singles within the eligibility period of December 1, 2009 until November 30, 2010 and the blurbs are in 140 characters or less. Don't forget to check out last year's list here.

50. "Magic"
by B.o.B Featuring Rivers Cuomo
The dynamic duo of Hip-Pop mash-up.

49. "Bed Intruder Song"
by Antoine Dodson & the Gregory Brothers Featuring Kelly Dodson
The biggest YouTube sensation of the year party-crashed the Hot 100 with this heavily Auto-Tuned number. How can you say no to lyrics like this: "Hide yo kids, Hide yo wife and hide yo husband 'cause they’re rapin' errbody out here."

48. "Eclipse (All Yours)"
by Metric
Bite me, Edward.

47. "Power"
by Kanye West Featuring Dwele
It samples King Crimson's "21st Century Schizoid Man" with a little touch of rock. Perfection.

46. "Only Girl (In the World)"
by Rihanna
Dancehall-friendly.

45. "We R Who We R"
by Ke$ha
Anthem for the underdogs.

44. "Parachute"
by Cheryl Cole
The infectious beat will keep you humming for days!

43. "How Low"
by Ludacris
It gets annoying after a few listens, but the midget-y voice in the chorus is so addictive.

42. "Naturally"
by Selena Gomez & the Scene
The music video is a hardcore OCD porn.

41. "OMG"
by Usher Featuring will.i.am
2 words. Club favorite.

40. "Cooler Than Me"
by Mike Posner
He is so adorable -- in a middle-class white trash kinda way.

39. "Tighten Up"
by The Black Keys
The greatest band of the frickin' year! The song is so good! So good.

38. "Your Love"
by Nicki Minaj
This girl's unstoppable. A big year for her.

37. "Just a Dream"
by Nelly
Nelly gets his Pop on.

36. "California Gurls"
by Katy Perry Featuring Snoop Dogg
This crowd-pleasing sugary goodness is not for the indie hipsters.

35. "Symphonies"
by Dan Black
Guess what song did he sample? The winner will get a cookie.

34. "Billionaire"
by Travie McCoy Featuring Bruno Mars
There's nothing wrong with being ambitious. Even when your ex practically owned half of 2010.

33. "Please Don't Go"
by Mike Posner
He's a gentle lover. Tingly.

32. "Impossible"
by Shontelle
A poor man's Rihanna's managed to hold her own this time around.

31. "Get Outta My Way"
by Kylie Minogue
Every 5 minutes, three gay men would die of cardiac arrest from listening to this rainbow-colored, confetti-throwing, hair-whipping, finger-wagging piece of queer opus.

30. "Neutron Star Collision (Love Is Forever)"
by Muse
Muse does what they do best: Grandiose production.

29. "Wonderful Life"
by Hurts
You will be transported back to the year 1995. Fasten your seatbelt.

28. "In My Head"
by Jason Derülo
So unoriginal, so good.

27. "The Big Bang"
by Rock Mafia
Like it or not, you will get addicted to the song. The video? Just ignore Miley's jacked-up teeth.

26. "Make Me Wanna Die"
by The Pretty Reckless
Little J's all grown up. Maybe a little too grown up.

25. "Monster"
by Kanye West Featuring Jay-Z, Rick Ross, Nicki Minaj & Bon Iver
Nicki Minaj steals everyone's thunder in this one.

24. "Need You Now"
by Lady Antebellum
Needy or in love?

23. "Not Afraid"
by Eminem
Oddly inspirational.

22. "Back to December"
by Taylor Swift
I'm sorry, Taylor (Lautner). Love, Taylor (Swift).

21. "One in a Million"
by Ne-Yo
Sort of like a homage to MJ.

20. "Rude Boy"
by Rihanna
The theme: Getting it on.

19. "Like a G6"
by Far*East Movement Featuring Cataracs & Dev
We all know why they wear shades all the time. It's unnerving to hear a bunch of underweight Asians rap about being "gangstas."

18. "If I Had You"
by Adam Lambert
Lambert at his best!

17. "Airplanes (Part II)"
by B.o.B Featuring Eminem & Hayley Williams
A peek at his life before fame.

16. "Mine"
by Taylor Swift
She's all grown up. Lyrically. I think.

15. "Indestructible"
by Robyn
Robyn has once again proven that she's the greatest pop factory there is.
WARNING: THE MUSIC VIDEO IS NSFW.

14. "Grenade"
by Bruno Mars
The theme song for jilted lovers all around the world.

13. "Over"
by Drake
The King of Downbeat Rap. Amazing.

12. "Bright Lights"
by Placebo
The Goth-Indie-Pop groove that would give you the chills.

11. "What's My Name?"
by Rihanna Featuring Drake
Oh na na. Best hook of the year, no?

10. "Alejandro"
by Lady Gaga
The song is a strong reminiscence of Madonna's "La Isla Bonita," and that's a good thing.

9. "Just the Way You Are"
by Bruno Mars
A great example of a song that can get you laid and panties thrown at you just by singing it.

8. "Dog Days Are Over"
by Florence + the Machine
One word. Ethereal.

7. "Nothin' on You"
by B.o.B Featuring Bruno Mars
They sing what guys do best: Uttering sweet nothings.

6. "Any Which Way"
by Scissor Sisters
Can this band get any campier? The song is laden with double entendres and sassy zings.

5. "Teenage Dream"
by Katy Perry
Your inner teen is screaming to get the hell out.

4. "Love the Way You Lie"
by Eminem Featuring Rihanna
This love-hate relationship saga is burning with rage and passion.

3. "XXXO"
by M.I.A.
It's girlish. It's naughty. M.I.A. pushes the boundaries. Once again.

2. "Runaway"
by Kanye West Featuring Pusha T
The song has single-handedly erased Kanye-gate from the minds of Taylor Swift-loving freaks and oh, the piano intro is to die for.

1. "Fuck You"
by Cee Lo Green
He's cheeky and nonchalant to the point that you would forget that he curses 16 times in the song. The Motown sound is a fresh break from other Top 40 songs we've heard on the radio in the past 12 months.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:
1. "Imma Be" by The Black Eyed Peas
2. "Dancing on My Own" by Robyn
3. "Misery" by Maroon 5
4. "Dynamite" by Taio Cruz
5. "Little Lion Man" by Mumford & Sons

Thoughts? What are your favorite songs of 2010?

WHAT'S MY NAME?

2010-11-13T17:19:00.008+08:00

One of my favorite songs this year. Great chemistry!

THE SOCIAL NET WORTH

2010-11-09T06:33:00.007+08:00

After a much-needed 2-month hiatus, I'm back and probably more fabulous than ever. I've been really busy with my studies and stuff, so here you go, my first entry after what seems to be an eternity. ~~Ridh away~~ Read away!

"The Social Network" (2010)
COLUMBIA PICTURES

WHY?: It is a testament to Generation Z's temporal existence, just like what "The Breakfast Club" did to the 80's and "Fight Club" to the 90's. Never in recent memory has anyone ever seen a movie with such strong characters and clever dialogs rolled into one nerdy package. You just have to Like it.

SECOND TAKE: Could this be the best movie of the year? Probably. The opening scene is annoyingly brutal as we see Mark Zuckerberg (played by Jesse Eisenberg) having a war of words by using boastful statements, sarcasms and blatant honesty as weapons with his date Erica Albright (it must be noted that she is a fictional character to represent Zuckerberg's non-existence love life) played by the sensational Rooney Mara (playing the lead in 2011's much-hyped American adaptation of "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo"). One might wonder that the fictionalized Zuckerberg may have zero social skills; he possibly suffers from Asperger syndrome; and is beyond tactless; hence Albright jilts him at the bar and calls him "an asshole." Upset, Zuckerberg starts a website, Facemash to rate undergrad girls in Harvard, and from there on he is approached by the Winklevoss twins to start a social networking website (Harvard Connection), and voilà, the idea of "thefacebook" is born. Eisenberg's portrayal of Zuckerberg is brilliant especially when he spews forth witty remarks and matter-of-factly punchlines. At one point of the movie he is seen making "glottal stop" sounds during an investor pitch meeting, and you could not help but wonder, does he suffer from Tourette's as well? The movie works so well by intertwining past events with the depositions from two lawsuits, and the characters spitball sarcasms, witty comments and emotional lines with such ease and it gives the movie some sort of "clock's ticking" pace with the help of insanely outstanding Trent Reznor-led soundtracks. In the movie, the friendship of Zuckerberg and Eduardo Saverin (portrayed by American-born Brit, Andrew Garfield, the new Spider-Man in its 2012's reboot) is the center of the story as their subsequent fallout is unfolded. It is hard to ignore that nagging thoughts in your head as how jealous Zuckerberg can be toward Saverin, but take note that the reality is generally heightened for dramatic purposes. This movie is not a verbatim accounts (pun?) of what really happened in the making of world's No. 2 most visited website. Armie Hammer takes double duties with his portrayal of the Winklevoss twins, Cameron and Tyler (body-doubled by Josh Pence) and he is freakishly impressive playing the dual roles and that would definitely get the attention of Oscar voters, a long shot, but it is possible. Justin Timberlake? You would just want to punch his face. Yep, he's that good.

SCENE STEALER: Garfield's portrayal as a betrayed friend is very emotionally-driven and convincingly honest. The web is abuzz with him being likely to grab one of the coveted spots in the Best Supporting Actor category in the Oscar race next year. Garfield is one heck of an actor and he proves that you do not need prosthetic nose or gain/lose 40 lbs to get the (acting) job done. Just wear a suit all the time.

BEST SCENE: Garfield's Saverin's breakdown upon learning his share of the company has been diluted and his subsequent verbal tirade with Zuckerberg. He seals his Oscar nomination the moment he smashes the MacBook Pro to pieces. It takes guts to smash a MacBook Pro. Period.

THE FLIP SIDE: The lack of strong female characters and flagrant stereotypical portrayals of "college girls" could be misconstrued as sexist.

OF LAMB STEWS & GRATED CHEESE

2010-08-21T22:06:00.006+08:00

You can read about our epic French buka puasa here.

VAMPIRE SEX

2010-08-18T02:09:00.009+08:00

Oh. My. Gawd.

They're really pushing the envelope this time around. For better pixelation, click on the photo and devour the bloody ménage à trois on the latest Rolling Stone cover.

DARK PASSENGER

2010-07-25T03:26:00.004+08:00

I AM OFFICIALLY IN HELL! The first sneak peek of Dexter's fifth season is here!

The Dark Passenger is back in the greatest show on TV. I cannot frickin' wait. September seems so far away!

SPOILER ALERT: Do not frickin' watch the video if you haven't watched the SHOCKING finale of season four.

I'm serious.

Do. Not.

Wait, I have a feeling Quinn's going to be in the garbage bags by the end of season five. Just a hunch.

THE INCARCERATION

2010-07-21T13:56:00.003+08:00

Lindsay Lohan's latest mugshot has officially been released and I must say that it's not her best shot. Nothing can beat this.

Stay away from the dykes in the shower. And oh, girl, you look good in orange PJ. It goes well with your fake tan and drunk face.

Good luck in the pokey!

DARKLY DREAMING

2010-07-18T17:39:00.028+08:00

Yep, it's official, "Inception" is the best movie of the year (so far)! The most mind-blowing 148 minutes of star-studded brain tease of 2010.

Epic.

Effing. Epic.

TEAM CHARLIE... NATCH.

2010-07-13T00:52:00.027+08:00

No blood. No boner.

No thanks.

FLIPPING OUT

2010-07-07T04:24:00.030+08:00

And now we're back with a fun entry. Yay!

I found a video of Lady Gaga when she was still a human circa 2005. Remember Boiling Points on MTV? Yep, that's Gaga you see. Potty mouth, much?

OF SLOPPY SECONDS & ANGRY INCHES

2010-07-06T01:12:00.010+08:00

You see, since the epic 2008's "Mr. Know-It-All fiasco" (the six 'controversial' entries had since been deleted... duh), some of you might have noticed that my blog has skewed more towards the trivial entertainment scoops and pop culture 411's. I figured that it is safer not to talk about other people especially those 'uptight bunch,' after letting my PR go bonkers working on her damage control magic to salvage the messy situation.

But...

I can't help myself. I need to let this one out of my system. For the love of God, can you please, please, please stop mingling with other people's sloppy seconds! It's not just the rule of feminism, it's the rule of friendship. Why do you need sloppy seconds, when you can get the first serving of gastronomic orgasm outside of our little circle. I'm not going to bash you by saying that you're insecure or desperate because I think you know yourself better than anyone else and a little journey of self-discovery wouldn't hurt. Hey, nobody's perfect and I'm not perfect either. I have my insecurities, but I don't go around looking for the nearest angry inch I could snag just to make myself worthy of something. I'm sure you're a great person and you might have amazing friends from high school, but right now you're being engulfed in this social sinkhole and you've got a few seconds left to save the remnants of your dignity.

You know, a little advice from me, get a fucking new PR team, because your current one sucks balls. They probably busy talking about themselves and getting their nails done. You probably be cursing me right now asking yourself, what is this sodding piece of shit talking about 'PR team' and whatnot. You know, it's sort of like a term (or more like a personal joke) I use to refer to that two 'meaningless' words they call, uh, REAL FRIENDS. Get them fast, because I heard they're pretty amazing.

Thank you.

Wait, more like, you're welcome.

And no hard feelings.

XOXO!

OF COFFEE & MUFFINS

2010-06-30T13:07:00.016+08:00

As I was busy looking through some pictures in my phone, I found this:

Pictured, my supervisor and I in the BOH, circa early 2009

I honestly miss working in Starbucks! I miss going to eat Mee Sua in Shihlin for breaks; I miss putting dollops of whipped cream and swirls of caramel drizzle on my EmpBev's (read: employee beverages); I miss meeting friendly customers; I miss meeting rude customers; I miss sampling new cakes and muffins; I miss pretending to love "gourmet" coffee; I miss Berjaya discounts; I miss buying all the tumblers and Christmas knickknacks and leaving the plain and ugly ones for the customers to buy; I miss the take-now-pay-later "policy;" I miss hearing all the dirty jokes from the guys; I miss making dirty jokes; I miss attempting to make "the perfect cappuccino;" I miss working in the morning when it's quiet with no customers around; I miss getting free summer/Christmas/seasonal tees; I miss being the go-to guy for the end-of-day reports; I miss making up conversations in my mind from afar when I see lame couples; I miss getting yelled by my manager because "there's no Frapp mix in the chiller;" I miss exchanging Frapp with a KFC meal during Ramadan; I miss being "liked" by people from other shops because they want free drinks; I miss standing up for 10 hours until I get corns on my toes; I miss giving "discounts" to my friends; I miss yelling "item 86'd" at the top of my lung; I miss calling out beverages -- the longer the better -- "I've got a to-go tall, low fat, 3 packets Equal, whipped, caramel drizzle, extra shot vanilla latte!"

And most of all, I miss all my partners. The greatest people ever. Ever.

XOXO!

GET YOUR GEEK ON

2010-06-30T12:22:00.007+08:00

Yep! It's that time of the year again! I'm gonna be like a kid in a candy store.

By the way, Aafin, do you still want Hosseini's or something else? I'll make it happen. And Linda, that thing we discussed the other night is officially confirmed. I could rule the world.

XOXO!

KING CON

2010-06-20T00:13:00.005+08:00

So, I haven't updated my blog for quite a while. I'm still reeling from my previous (personal) "record-shattering" long entry. I just finished watching a movie called "I Love You Phillip Morris" and yes, I love it. After months of keeping myself posted with the updates on the movie, what's with the delayed release dates (three times!), its messy legal battles and leak (ahem), I finally got a chance to watch it. The movie is like a funny and (much, much) less depressing version of "Monster" -- and of course, sans the pussy-eating and Oscar-worthy performances.

"I Love You Phillip Morris" (2009)
CONSOLIDATED PICTURES GROUP

WHY?: This funny and matter-of-factly take on a real life story of con artist Steven Russell -- dubbed "Houdini" and "King Con" by many -- is as refreshing as a glass of cold lemonade on a hot summer day.

SECOND TAKE: In the movie, the theme 'love' takes center stage, instead of the crimes committed. It's amazing to see the length Russell (played by Jim Carrey) would go to get himself and his lover, Phillip Morris (played by Ewan McGregor) out of prison, almost to the point that the movie glorifies his lies and crimes. Nothing to complain there because when the dust settles, we all would agree that Russell is a pretty awesome con artist and he is infamously known as "an embarrassment to the State of Texas and its then-Governor George Bush" after countless times of scheming, escapes and prison breaks. Carey delivers an amazing performance with, I believe, his own interpretation of Russell (portrayed as high-strung and oftentimes neurotic) and this is a good follow-up after the disastrous "Yes Man." And yes, his 'new' horsey teeth is still annoying. McGregor goes 180 as an effeminate guy in love, his character, Morris is portrayed as gullible and overtrusting, a great performance, albeit not his best.

BEST SCENE: The man (SPOILER!) faked AIDS! AIDS! No wonder Bush was pissed.

DOWNSIDE: Leslie Mann's lack of screen time as a Jesus-loving ex-wife.

Just watch it, minions. Now scram!

XOXO!

OF DRAKE, BIONIC & BOBBY RAY

2010-06-19T11:59:00.004+08:00

It's only June and I've listened to a lot of amazing albums. It's a pretty good year for music so far. I'm considering three amazing albums to be No. 1 on my year-end list. They are Drake's "Thank Me Later," B.o.B's "B.o.B Presents: The Adventures of Bobby Ray," and Christina Aguilera's "Bionic." Anything can happen in the next 5 months (the eligibility period ends in November) and more new albums are coming. It's anyone's game right now. To more great albums in the future... l'chaim!

One more thing: Once again the Twilight Saga (Eclipse) soundtrack blew my mind away! What's with this franchise and great music? If only the movies were good. Well, apparently you CAN'T have it all.

You can check out last year's list here.

XOXO!

OF "SEX" & AFTERTASTES

2010-06-19T07:58:00.015+08:00

What the frak!?

This is totally random: I checked the screening listing online and there's no "Sex" in Kluang. I mean, for Pete's sake they have 23 million showings of "Kapoww: Atoi the Ajaib Boy." This (read: "Atoi") is another prime example that the ~~Malaysian~~ Malay cinema is ~~really fucked-up~~ on its way down the crapper -- quality-wise at least -- and this by no means implies that Carrie and Co.'s drag parade is an awards-worthy, avant-garde critics fave. I just don't give two shit about Malay movies anymore. We need more movies like "Sepet," "Anak Halal," "Cinta" and heck, even "Cuci." I literally had to watch "Toy Story 3" to wash my tongue from the aftertaste of watching 3 seconds of "Atoi" trailer on TV.

Go figure.

XOXO!

A HOOT AND A HALF!

2010-06-05T03:14:00.005+08:00

By now I'm pretty sure all of you have already known that making "The List" is sort of like my thing, my forte. So now, I present to you my latest list, Get Gossipy™ 30 GREATEST TV CHARACTERS OF ALL TIME. You might not agree with some of my choices that made the ranking, but let's agree to disagree. I want to clear some things up, sort of like a disclaimer, most of the characters were from the 90's and the early 00's. Why? Because I'm not 105 years old. And all of them are from American TV shows. Why? Because of the sorry state of Malaysian TV shows (yes, I'm looking at you, Jidin) that makes me so traumatic to actually turn on the TV. And don't forget to share your thoughts. And yes, this is my longest entry so far. Brace yourself.

30. Jaye Tyler (Wonderfalls)
PORTRAYED BY CAROLINE DHAVERNAS

Too bad the show got cancelled after 13 episodes. Her life turns upside down when animal toys start talking to her and give her cryptic instructions that in the end it's going to reveal something about her life. People around her think that she has Jesus complex and that she's just another trailer trash, but... well the show got cancelled. That's pretty much all I can give you.

29. Felicity Porter (Felicity)
PORTRAYED BY KERI RUSSELL

Were you born in the 80's? Yes? Then you know her. One of the most recognizable female characters in the late 90's slash the early noughties slash the uprising of teen pop slash Pokémon craze.

28. Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi (Saturday Night Live)
PARODIED BY BOBBY MOYNIHAN

This spot-on parody of Snooki (of Jersey Shore fame) is one of the great highlights of SNL's 35 seasons on TV. "She" is ignorant, an Italian stereotype, loves cough syrup and thinks that getting punched on TV was the greatest thing that had ever happened to her. And she's orange in color. Literally.

MEMORABLE QUOTES
"You can call me PJ -- Prison Jumpsuit, because I'm bright orange and once I'm on you, you start to question the life decisions that got you to this point."
"I said touch it, don't mash it!"
“You can call me Spalding! Because I'm orange, leathery and get passed around by sweaty dudes!"

27. Jack Donaghy (30 Rock)
PORTRAYED BY ALEC BALDWIN

Jack Donaghy single-handedly revived Alec Baldwin's career from the crapper. Donaghy gives backhanded compliments like no one's business, he's successful, business-minded, a little misogynistic, a capitalist and he goes to the New York Stock Exchange when he's horny. 'Nuff said.

MEMORABLE QUOTES:
"She needs to lose thirty pounds or gain sixty. Anything in between has no place on television."
"I'm in the middle of a raging period... of economic turmoil."
"Have you ever been to Florida? It's a criminal population. It's America's Australia."
"I have faith... in things that I can buy and sell and deregulate. Capitalism is my religion."
"I may have sodomized our former vice president while under the influence of some weapons grade narcotics. Oh, it feels good to say that one out loud actually. That one was weighing on me."

26. Samantha Jones (Sex and the City)
PORTRAYED BY KIM CATTRALL

She is sex. Lotsa sex. And only Samantha can offend Charlotte this bad.

MEMORABLE QUOTES:
“I'm a try-sexual. I'll try anything once.”
“A guy can just as easily dump you if you fuck him on the first date as he can if you wait until the tenth.”
“Fuck me badly once, shame on you. Fuck me badly twice, shame on me.”
“Men cheat for the same reason that dogs lick their balls... because they can.”

25. Miranda Bailey (Grey's Anatomy)
PORTRAYED BY CHANDRA WILSON

She is referred to as "The Nazi." She's tough, she's blunt. And she's all-round AWESOME.

MEMORABLE QUOTE:
"I have five rules. Memorize them. Rule number one, don't bother sucking up. I already hate you, that's not going to change."

24. Fox Mulder & Dana Scully (The X Files)
PORTRAYED BY DAVID DUCHOVNY & GILLIAN ANDERSON

TV's greatest dynamic duo. Agree?

23. Steve Urkel (Family Matters)
PORTRAYED JALEEL WHITE

Oh gosh. I'm sure everybody remembers him. So clumsy, so funny!

22. Jack Bauer (24)
PORTRAYED KIEFER SUTHERLAND

The show debuted at the height of U.S. crusade against terrorist attacks. And Jack is sort of like a symbol of hope and anger... and good timing to capitalize on TV ratings. Genius.

21. Liz Lemon (30 Rock)
PORTRAYED BY TINA FEY

The funniest spinster (by today's standards) of all time. She's always worried that she's running out of time to find the "perfect man" because her biological clock is ticking. It's not helping that she's a very successful woman and very outspoken, and because of that she scares a lot of (insecure) ~~losers~~ men. Or is it because she's just socially awkward? Yeah, the latter.

MEMORABLE QUOTES:
"What the frak?"
"What the what!?"
Reading the title of the Chinese knock-off of her book, "Dealbreaker: The book for you, man no good. By Lesbian Yellow Sour-Fruit.”

20. Adrian Monk (Monk)
PORTRAYED BY TONY SHALHOUB

He's the modern day Sherlock Holmes with more phobias than any other human beings in this entire world. Once, he had a fear of blankets. Blankets! Seriously, what kind of nutcase has a fear of blankets?

MEMORABLE QUOTE:
Someone asks him, "I noticed you're touching all the poles - is that an American thing?" Monk, "Yes, it's an American tradition! I'm touching all the poles because I'm proud to be an American!" Nope. He's obviously counting them. Genius. Pure OCD genius!

19. Marc St. James & Amanda Tanen (Ugly Betty)
PORTRAYED BY MICHAEL URIE & BECKI NEWTON

One is snarky. And the other one is fashionable. Guess which one is which? You can't. They are essentially one character, very similar to each other and, in a way, very different in so many fabulous bitchy ways.

MEMORABLE QUOTES:
Marc, on Wilhelmina, "She was the Symbionese Liberation Army to my Patty Hearst. She even bought me a beret."
Amanda, "Babies are the hot new accessories in the gay world. Little dogs are so five minutes ago."

18. Fez (That '70s Show)
PORTRAYED BY WILMER VALDERRAMA

Two words. The accent. Or is it the lisp? I don't know.

MEMORABLE QUOTES:
"Cake is good, but you cannot have sex with cake."
"I would love car sex... Or just sex... Or just a car."

17. SpongeBob SquarePants (SpongeBob SquarePants)
VOICED BY TOM KENNY

Everyone's favorite ~~gay~~ asexual chatty (yellow) sponge. Period.

MEMORABLE QUOTE:
"I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready."

16. Michael Scott (The Office)
PORTRAYED BY STEVE CARELL

An American take on the much-lauded original British version isn't half bad. In fact, he's good. Why? Nobody can bring that awkward moments better than him. Cue the crickets sound.

15. Sally Solomon (3rd Rock from the Sun)
PORTRAYED BY KRISTEN JOHNSTON

She's perfect as a male alien trapped in a woman's body because she "lost a bet." Johnston's voice and big build help make the character funny and slapstick.

14. Gilbert "Gil" Grissom (CSI: Crime Scene Investigation)
PORTRAYED BY WILLIAM PETERSON

He is the face that makes "procedurals" cop drama cool again. Suck it, Horatio.

MEMORABLE QUOTE:
"Concentrate on what cannot lie. The evidence."

13. Homer Simpson (The Simpsons)
VOICED BY DAN CASTELLANETA

You do not want him to be your dad. He's rude, ignorant and dumb. He's the satirical exaggeration of blue-collar Americans, and you can't help yourself to like him because everyone loves the underdog -- who strangely has better life experiences (seeing God, meeting famous celebrities), doesn't grow old(er) and had worked more than 160 odd-jobs.

MEMORABLE QUOTE:
"D'oh!" Duh.

12. Tara Gregson & the Alters (United States of Tara)
PORTRAYED BY TONI COLLETTE

Pure genius! As of now, Tara has 6 alter egos, ranging from a slutty teenager (T) to a man (Vietnam war survivor, Buck) and her 5-year-old self (Chicken). She suffers from DID or in layman's term, multiple-personality disorder and has no control over her doppelgängers. Her other alters are the 50's housewife, Alice; an animalistic Neanderthal, Gimme; and a hippie shrink, Shoshana Schoenbaum.

11. Ally McBeal (Ally McBeal)
PORTRAYED BY CALISTA FLOCKHART

Throughout the show's run, she has hallucinated more times that any whack job in any asylum. With all the dancing baby (the show was responsible to bring the hype back in the late 90's) and that sudden blank stares, she should get committed (read: involuntarily sent to a madhouse), but all she wants in life is to have a great relationship and experience that funny word that gets thrown around aimlessly called LOVE.

10. Rachel Green (Friends)
PORTRAYED BY JENNIFER ANISTON

She's not the funniest among the friends, but she's sure nice to look at and she sort of grows on you. The best thing about her is that, she started out as this spoiled brat that everyone hated and then throughout the show we can see how she becomes a woman -- a mature, less self-absorbed woman.

9. Dexter Morgan (Dexter)
PORTRAYED BY MICHAEL C. HALL

Is it wrong to root for a serial killer? Yes, it's wrong, but there's nothing wrong with rooting for Dexter. Deep down you know he's a good guy trapped in this mind with morbid urge to kill people. He's numb and has no "real" feelings for anything and anybody, so he puts on this "good-guy mask" to seem normal to others. To an extent, aren't we all like that too?

Oh, and blood is his pornography.

MEMORABLE QUOTES:

"Blood. Sometimes it sets my teeth on edge, other times it helps me control the chaos."
"People fake a lot of human interactions, but I feel like I fake them all, and I fake them very well, that's my burden, I guess."

8. Lorelai Gilmore (Gilmore Girls)
PORTRAYED BY LAUREN GRAHAM

Best TV mom ever! Make that the best fast-talking, name-dropping, pop culture-referencing TV mom ever.

Ever.

7. Valerie Cherish (The Comeback)
PORTRAYED BY LISA KUDROW

Too bad the show got cancelled after only one season. Valerie Cherish is the poster child of honest and brutal depiction of the reality of reality TV. She's the face of Hollywood has-beens trying to get a second chance in fame and glory. Watching her is like watching two cars crashing into each other in slow motion. You will cringe, roll your eyes and then... pity her.

MEMORABLE QUOTE:
"You see puppies, I see Korean barbecue!" Crickets sound.

6. Phil Dunphy (Modern Family)
PORTRAYED BY TY BURRELL

You would want him to be your dad! He's awkward and he thinks he's cool. What's cooler than watching a self-proclaimed "cool dad," you might ask? Watching a man who's possibly on the verge of a mid-life crisis with questionable sense of parenting skills. Or lack thereof.

MEMORABLE QUOTE:
None other than this epic quote -- possibly the best TV quote of 2009: "I'm cool dad, that's my thang. I'm hip, I surf the web, I text. LOL: laugh out loud, OMG: oh my god, WTF: why the face." Who can say that with a straight face?

5. Jack McFarland (Will & Grace)
PORTRAYED BY SEAN HAYES

He is the walking stereotypes of a gay man -- he's delusional about his acting and singing talent, he can't keep a relationship more than a week, hates lesbians and has a morbid fascination with Cher. He's very flamboyant, giggles when anyone says the word "penis" and loves to make fun of Will's hairline. He also has a son -- the baby mama is a lesbian nurse who stole the sperm he deposited in the sperm bank when he was a teenager. Why the hell did he deposit his sperm? Because he needed money to buy a new coat. Natch.

MEMORABLE QUOTES:
"Fact: Before language, people communicated through intricate choreography, costume changes, and lighting. Language was only invented when unattractive people were born and needed to be commented on."
"You're so generous. I swear, if you weren't Jewish, you'd definitely go to heaven."
"Ladies and gentlemen, fresh from 45 minutes of butt-robics, I give you my ass."
"I'm here, I'm queer, get used to it."
"Life is too short to waste time on over thinking things. When an opportunity comes, I don't question it. I grab it, drop its ring on the nightstand, and swing on it 'til dawn!"

4. Mary Cherry (Popular)
PORTRAYED BY LESLIE GROSSMAN

The greatest sideshow on TV. Ever. She's the documented parody of rich white Middle America. She's rude, spoiled, "borderline retarded" and she has a twin sister named B.Ho from the Bronx.

MEMORABLE QUOTE:
"...As a Christian, I'm just not comfortable with man's hairy hands touching my spongy places, propelling my buttocks heavenwards."

3. Sheldon Cooper (The Big Bang Theory)
PORTRAYED BY JIM PARSONS

Being socially inept is not easy, but Sheldon sure makes it fun (and funny). He suffers from OCD, hypochondriasis, has fear of dirt, inability to lie and understand sarcasm, stage fright, inability to sit in strange places and intolerant of people in his bedroom. Sadly, I just described myself.

And you thought you had it worse?

MEMORABLE QUOTES:
"Bazinga."
"That's not afternoon. That's pre-vening"

2. Carrie Bradshaw (Sex and the City)
PORTRAYED BY SARAH JESSICA PARKER

It's not about fashion or shoes. It's not about sex or the city. It's about Carrie, living in New York and trying to find meaning in life and love. She's fragile and gullible and because of that everybody finds it easy to relate to her in some ways or another.

MEMORABLE QUOTES:
"I revealed too much too soon. I was emotionally slutty."
"That's the thing about friends, they will always hold your hair back when you're sick."
"I'm looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't-live-without-each-other love."

1. Karen Walker (Will & Grace)
PORTRAYED BY MEGAN MULLALLY

It's not an overstatement to say that Karen is the gem of the show and it would not have survived its 8-season run without this drunk socialite. She's loud, funny, immoral and has a questionable grasp on reality. She famously draws her past life parallel to the plots of famous movies (i.e. To Sir, With Love, Speed). Her trademark shrilly voice what makes her so annoyingly likeable and she always gets the best punchlines on the show. With Jack, they are the greatest comedy duo that had ever graced (pun?) the television.

MEMORABLE QUOTES:
"Honey, what's that? What's going on? What's happening?"
"I've got buckets of money, I'm a hoot and a half, and I've got a killer rack."
"Honey, I don't produce theater. I am theater."

HONORABLE MENTIONS:
Christina Yang PORTRAYED BY SANDRA OH (Grey's Anatomy)
Wilhelmina Slater PORTRAYED BY VANESSA WILLIAMS (Ugly Betty)
Miranda Hobbes PORTRAYED BY CYNTHIA NIXON (Sex and the City)
Lynette Scavo PORTRAYED BY FELICITY HUFFMAN (Desperate Housewives)
Philip J. Fry VOICED BY BILLY WEST (Futurama)
Judy Grimes PORTRAYED BY KRISTIN WIIG (Saturday Night Live)
George 'Gob' Bluth II PORTRAYED BY WILL ARNETT (Arrested Development)
Ling Woo PORTRAYED BY LUCY LIU (Ally McBeal)
Buffy Summers PORTRAYED BY SARAH MICHELLE GELLAR (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

What do you think? What are your favorite TV characters? Comment away, ~~minions~~ readers.

XOXO!

THE PENT-UP RAGE

2010-05-22T23:53:00.011+08:00

Wow.

At last, I managed to watch the season finale of Grey's Anatomy after so much buzz online. I stopped watching the show 20 seasons ago after Izzie Stevens (played by Katherine Heigl) started having this hallucination and I told myself, "That's it, no more Grey's for me." The Izzie story arc was too contrived for my liking...

And then there was the Season 6's finale (E23/E24). I've got a word for it -- EPIC. The most overwhelming, emotionally-taxing and intense 90 minutes in the history of television (and possibly mankind). If you were not a fan, you still have to watch it. I've got to hand it to Shonda Rhimes (writer/creator), she sure knows a little thing or two about good television.

I say it again: THE GREATEST 90 MINUTES IN THE HISTORY OF TELEVISION.

Hope I'm not overselling it.

Who's that lying unconscious? McDreamy McDead?

Kudos to Chandra Wilson, who plays no-nonsense Dr. Miranda Bailey for her jaw-droppingly flawless performance in the episode. An Emmy is in order!

Michael O'Neill (the bad guy Gary Clark) was so believable that I hate him. To all the Gary Clarks of the world, violence is not the answer and accusing people of acting like God is a blatant dichotomy, when you too are acting like God by ending the lives of innocent people.

I spent the second half of the show bawling like a baby. What d'ya know, I might start watching the show again next season, eh?

XOXO!

GET DOMESTICATED

2010-05-19T18:39:00.007+08:00

It's official! Guess who's coming to Wisteria Lane next season!? It's none other than Mode's resident boss from hell ~~Vanessa Williams~~ Wilhelmina Slater! At last, someone's got a job to pay the bills. Yay!

"It will be the greatest comeback since... Jesus."
(Wilhelmina Slater, Ugly Betty S02E16)

I don't care that I'm one of the last seven people who is still watching the show.

Bite me.

XOXO!

A PERFECT FILM

2010-05-18T01:23:00.011+08:00

And now let me introduce to you, my second column! The title pretty much says it all. Things that I love and I want you to love or at least give them a try. In this inaugural Ridh Recommends™ entry, I want all of you to watch a movie called "A Single Man." I've managed to watch it the other day and I love every single (pun?) minute of it. Five months of waiting paid off when it finally leaked. How can you not get excited with this amazing trailer? The Oscar buzz on this movie was almost deafening earlier this year, but it was snubbed with only a single (another possible pun?) nomination for Best Actor. Without a doubt this movie should've been in my '09 list. It's definitely in my TOP 10 FAVORITE MOVIES OF ALL TIME because of its stark resemblance to "The Hours" -- another of my favorite.

"A Single Man" (2009)
THE WEINSTEIN COMPANY

WHY?: My obsession with slow-paced movies with great musical scores is so obvious by now. Okay, the ultimate reason can actually be summed up in three words -- Ford, Firth and Moore.

SECOND TAKE: Can someone get Abel Korzeniowski his Oscar already! His flawless musical scores really capture the poignancy of the movie and they give it a sense of urgency without losing the intended emotions. This is Tom Ford's first outing as a director, having become the most recognizable name in fashion. The snub by the members of the Academy is totally understandable because they usually would not laud rookie directors, but this is definitely a great start for Ford and I'm sure everybody is looking forward to his next project. Moving on, now let's talk about Colin Firth and Julianne Moore. Firth's poignant portrayal as a suicidal heartbroken man who'd just lost his partner is spot-on and laden with emotional depths. Moore on the other hand, has always been my favorite actress and she is amazing in her portrayal of a jobless, good-for-nothing fag hag. She's never failed to impress me and she is the reason why I love the aforementioned "The Hours."

BEST SCENES: I would say the whole movie because of its glossy and dazzling visual, but if you want me to go more in-depth and substantial, I would say, the scene where Charley (Moore) is having a great evening with George (Firth); and Kenny's (Nicholas Hoult) flirtation with George throughout the movie.

DOWNSIDE: Watching "About a Boy" boy (Hoult) trying to get his American accent right and erase every trace of his Britishness, but he's amazing nonetheless. He's pretty convincing as a bi-curious kid.

Cripes! I'm rambling and I'm sure I've bored you to death. Last words: Go effing watch the movie already!

XOXO!

COULDA BEEN

2010-05-17T23:56:00.003+08:00

Okay, another Desperate Housewives entry. I know, I know, please don't cringe. I'm just so in the mood to update right now. So, I was busy googling John Barrowman (the vengeful "environmental terrorist" in Season 6) last week and one link led to another, I stumbled upon a very interesting trivia about Desperate Housewives -- albeit six years too late. The aired "pilot episode" (read: first/test episode) was not the original episode. They had to reshoot half of the episode due to recasting and after a little digging I've found it (read: the unaired episode, S01E00) and watched it. I was so mesmerized with the whole "coulda been" scenarios. Let the photo comparisons do the talking, shall we?

The original title card looked like it came from some 90's afternoon soap nobody would watch. To look fancier, they revamped it with a naked Eve.

The original Mary Alice (Sheryl Lee) was dropped with an undisclosed reason, but I think it's because she looked too old for the part and she has this annoying lazy voice. I think Brenda Strong suits the character better and she undoubtedly has the most recognizable female voice on TV right now, even if you're not a fan, you would know that it's "the voice of that chick from that campy show."

The original John Rowland (Kyle Searles) was dropped because of the lack of chemistry with Eva Longoria. And now we know Eva liked her gardener (Jesse Metcalfe) Italian with a cocoa brown tan.

The Rex Van de Kamp we know (Steven Culp) was actually the first choice, but he had a scheduling conflict at the time. When everything was smoothed over, the actor in the pilot (Michael Reilly Burke) was later dropped -- that's Holywood for you, baby! Mean.

Okay, that's all.

Thank you.

XOXO!

GAWD! MY BLOG IS 400 ENTRIES OLD. OREO COOKIES AND SLOPPY KISSES FOR YOU AVID ~~MINIONS~~ READERS!

PAUL YOUNG IS BACK, BITCHES!

2010-05-17T16:08:00.004+08:00

Just finished watching the season finale of Desperate Housewives (Season 6). It's not awesome, but on the whole, it's a pretty good episode. The season finales are the only thing that I look forward to in Desperate Housewives because of the dramatic cliffhangers. And I've got to say that for the last three seasons, Marc Cherry has been assaulting me with crappy storylines.

And oh, Paul Young is back!

Can't wait for the seventh season!

XOXO!

JUNK

2010-05-16T23:07:00.007+08:00

As I was lying in my bed, a thought crossed my mind. You see, there are so many great inventions in this world, namely Post-It notes, flush toilets and straws, but there are also a lot of useless inventions and I've got to tell you that the pee slots take the cake. Whoever invented the pee slot obviously did not have a penis and I think all of you would agree with me on this one: No man in this world ever fucking use the pee slot. Seriously, nobody.

Why do you need to go to all the trouble when you can just pull down the elastic waistband.

Duh.

XOXO!

GAGA-PELLA!

2010-05-08T23:04:00.006+08:00

Epic.

University of Oregon's all-male a cappella ensemble did a fantastic job singing "Bad Romance" sans musical instrument. With that, Lady Gaga's world domination continues... and somewhere, Christina Aguilera is bawling into obscurity.

XOXO!

VINTAGE ME

2010-05-08T02:02:00.018+08:00

As you all know, currently I'm doing a major "rebranding" for my blog. Yep, this is a blatant attempt from me to get more hits and to make this blog more manageable and personal. Thank you for all your support, ~~minions~~ readers!

Introducing the first (out of five) section of my quasi-revamped blog...

I'm going to post pictures, videos or anything that has got to do with the past and it's not just about me. It could be about, let's say, Lady Gaga's old videos when she was still a human or photos of Justin Bieber when he was still a zygote. You get the picture. Speaking of picture, look what I found earlier this week:

This further proves that I've been bringing "The Pout" since 1994! Deal with it, Mary-Kate. Look at me, I was like 7 and gosh, I looked so precious!

Adorbs.

XOXO!

PLAN B

2010-04-24T15:14:00.006+08:00

J.Lo's new movie, "The Back-up Plan" has leaked online and it's not even out yet! I've watched it and I frickin' love it.

J.Lo and rom-com can never go wrong. Never. Ever.

XOXO!

DAMAGE CONTROL

2010-04-23T23:41:00.006+08:00

Wise choice, Comedy Central!

The network went all-out in removing every single trace of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) in the recent episodes of South Park by censor-blocking and bleeping every mention of him.

What's more annoying than censor-blocking you ask? Try listening through 60 seconds of bleeping. It's going to make your ears bleed.

Thank you.

XOXO!

OF BLASPHEMIES & JIHADISTS

2010-04-23T02:38:00.006+08:00

So, the creators of South Park (and Comedy Central) have succumbed to the 'veiled threat' made by some American jihadists earlier this week for depicting Prophet Muhammad in a bear suit by bleeping and censoring the whole episode. As I am mildly offended by the episode, I just don't think the threat was necessary. And I've got to say, the episode was kinda funny in a blasphemous kinda way.

Was the threat necessary? No.

Why? Because this is the show that has depicted Jesus as a porn-watching freak and glorified a coke-snorting Buddha.

Nobody takes South Park seriously. Seriously.

XOXO!

JACKIE!

2010-04-15T11:14:00.005+08:00

Rachel Weisz nabs the role of a lifetime this week when she's chosen as the title role in the upcoming Jackie Kennedy biopic. Her uncanny resemblance to Jackie O is obviously the driving force behind the choice. As British as one could be, the bigger question here, can she tackle a character so essentially American and remarkably iconic? Only time would tell.

And oh, I smell an Oscar in the bag.

XOXO!

AWESOME MUNSHI!

2010-04-12T10:16:00.010+08:00

Dunzo! The end of practicum, people! I thought that I couldn't make it, but I survived 3 months of teen tantrums and school politics. I got out of the school unscathed and more fabulous than ever. SMK Munshi Abdullah has been great to me. I promise that I will remember this experience forever.

Never in a million years that I thought that I would be able to do this. Everything turned out great and I owe this to my ~~beard~~ ~~fag hag~~ colleague Najwa. I love you girl! Thank you so much! Over the last 3 months, I've been called, Surya Sivakumar (no idea why), Superman/Clark Kent (the glasses I guess), Shahrukh Khan (the nose), Sir Macho/Handsome (my disgustingly broad man shoulders) and last but not least, Najwa's (fake) boyfriend/husband (we went to school together, I drove the car, so that explains the whole happy suburban couple theory) by the students.

Here are some photos of my students:

The girls from 2PK1.

The boys from 2PK1. They're very shy.

My favorite class, 2KA1. Some of the girls cried on my last class. They sang me "Kenangan Terindah" while having a sob-fest. Thank you, guys!

Proof that I'm funny (and awesome).

Shy boys of 2KA1. The whole class made a big-ass card for me.

Enough about me being the uppity bitch, now it's time to show my gratitude. I want to thank my mentor for the help and guidance, other English teachers who've never stopped trying to wring every single drop of energy out of my body, GPK Petang (the father figure), other teachers, my students and students from other classes who wished I taught them.

Thank you.

Oh, one more thing, one great thing that I've learned throughout the practicum is that we have to be positive even in the most hostile situation. People would not treat you maliciously if you didn't give them the upper hand to treat you like an unimportant piece of politically-incorrect over-marinated veal. Whatever that means.

That's all.

XOXO!

I'M COMIN'

2010-04-11T02:28:00.002+08:00

23

2010-01-21T01:18:00.003+08:00

Hello, birthday boy! Love you.

XOXO!

4 IN THE MORNIN'

2010-01-03T18:14:00.013+08:00

Today would definitely go down in history as one of the most memorable moments of my life, right between my first wet dream (gasp!) and first car accident. To all my fans, I'm okay, and after an extensive 'postmortem,' it's the carburator that's gone missing. That's going to cost quite a fortune to fix. I swear, those ah bengs who stole it, I'm going to (pardon my French) cut your dicks and sell them on eBay!

I can't stop laughing and making jokes the whole day. It's too painful for me to think about it. Maybe when it all has sunk in, I'm going to cry. It's okay to cry, right?

I really want to apologize to those who need a ride to their respective schools. Apparently, we hit a road bump (so to speak) in our well-thought-out plan. Thank God for Plan B!

I have no car for the time being. How great. Practicum starts tomorrow.

Great.

What doesn't kill ya, will cost ya. Yes, you can quote me.

XOXO!

BEST OF 2009 (PART TROIS)

2009-12-31T23:39:00.009+08:00

Here's the last part of the "Best of 2009" series, Get Gossipy™ 50 BEST SONGS OF 2009. Songs should be released as singles within the eligibility period of December 1, 2008 until November 30, 2009 and the blurbs are in 140 characters or less. Here you go:

50. "I Love College" by Asher Roth

The world where the keg is God, sex is sustenance and when it comes to condoms you have to "put two on." Trust him.

49. "According to You" by Orianthi

She's Michael Jackson's Australian guitarist for the canceled "This Is It" concert series and she's awesome.

48. "Come Home" by OneRepublic Featuring Sara Bareilles

Match made in musical heaven.

47. "If U Seek Amy" by Britney Spears

F.U.C.K. Me. Yup, the last time I checked, sex still sells.

46. "Friday I'll Be Over U" by Allison Iraheta

She only came in fourth place on AI8, but Allison has won our hearts with her rock chick attitude.

45. "Sinner" by Big B Featuring Scott Russo

White trash at its best.

44. "Best I Ever Had" by Drake

The video is a blatant attempt to exploit women's breasts.

43. "Did It Again" by Shakira

Her constipated voice is music to my ears. Seriously.

42. "Party in the USA" by Miley Cyrus

America's new national anthem. Even Rolling Stone crowned it fourth best song of 2009. Go figure.

41. "Love Sex Magic" by Ciara Featuring Justin Timberlake

These two have chemistry. Agree?

40. "Two is Better Than One" by Boys Like Girls Featuring Taylor Swift

This song's going to make you go, "Aww."

39. "Ego (Remix)" by Beyoncé Featuring Kanye West

"So stroke my big... ego." Unapologetic use of innuendos by Kanye and B.

38. "Body Language" by Jesse McCartney Featuring T-Pain

Jesse McCartney is awkward and I'm not convinced that he can get all the ladies from around the world with that boyish look.

37. "Fallin' For You" by Colbie Caillat

Her sultry voice suits the song on every level!

36. "Diva" by Beyoncé

After a few spins, you'll get annoyed. And then, you want to listen to it again. Damn.

35. "Hard" by Rihanna Featuring Young Jeezy

She's a big girl now. The song is so brash and raw. Love it.

34. "I Know You Want Me (Calle Ocho)" by Pitbull

It's catchy. It's fun. It's everybody's ringtone.

33. "Boom Boom Pow" by Black Eyed Peas

Futuristic confection for the ears.

32. "Birthday Sex" by Jeremih

Guy: I'm just giving you what YOU want.
Girl: Yeah, turn it into my thing now, so you can get away with it later.
Guy: No, baby, I love you.
Girl: M'm? (Pout!)

Oops! More than 140 characters.

31. "How Do You Sleep? (Remix)" by Jesse McCartney Featuring Ludacris

Thank you Luda for saving this song. Truly, thank you.

30. "I Don't Believe You" by P!nk

P!nk bares her soul. Naked, so naked.

29. "Fireflies" by Owl City

He suffered from insomnia, so he wrote this song. How cute!

28. "Katy Perry" by Thinking of You"

Nobody beats first love, huh?

27. "Who Says" by John Mayer

The Twitter King repeats the word 'stoned' like 300 times in this song. Oh, now that explains the random tweets.

26. "Doesn't Mean Anything" by Alicia Keys

Essentially Alicia, perfectly deep.

25. "Fifteen" by Taylor Swift

Being 15 was tough for me. For you. And for Taylor. We are all the same, except now she has a fat bank account.

24. "Do You Remember" by Jay Sean Featuring Sean Paul & Lil Jon

Sometimes I forget he's Punjabi. Hello, Mr. Kamaljeet Singh Jhooti. How that name turns into 'Jay Sean' is still a mystery to me.

23. "Wait Your Turn" by Rihanna

One word. Ova.

22. "Lucky" by Jason Mraz & Colbie Caillat

Practically every living and breathing human being knows this song. Hands down, the most overplayed song of the year.

21. "Funhouse" by P!nk

The highlight of the song is when she starts counting down. Cute.

20. "One Love" by David Guetta Featuring Estelle

I'm convinced, Estelle is the new Mary J.

19. "She Wolf" by Shakira

"Starting to feel just a little abused, like a coffee machine in an office." What the fuck?

18. "Starstrukk" by 3OH!3 Featuring Katy Perry

The pimped-up version of the original. Much better and sexier!

17. "Ignorance" by Paramore

I heart Hayley Williams (and Josh Farro)!

16. "Make Her Say" by Kid Cudi Featuring Kanye West & Common

Formerly known as "I Poke Her Face." Don't ask.

15. "My Life Would Suck Without You" by Kelly Clarkson

She's back!

14. "The Climb" by Miley Cyrus

Miley at her finest.

13. "Down" by Jay Sean Featuring Lil Wayne

I used to think he's lame, but now with this big production and even bigger featured artist, he doesn't sound too shabby.

12. "Dead and Gone" by T.I. Featuring Justin Timberlake

Check out the lyrics, it's deep. And now, check him out, it's T.I.ngly.

11. "TiK ToK" by Ke$ha

Let's worship the girl who looks like she hasn't showered in 3 days.

10. "Russian Roulette" by Rihanna

That shock-factor works for this song. You manipulative bitch.

9. "Dream Big" by Jazmine Sullivan

Very inspiring song and she has a great voice.

8. "Blame It" by Jamie Foxx Featuring T-Pain

Spread your legs and blame it on the a-a-a-alcohol.

7. "Bad Romance" by Lady Gaga

My advice: Take a break, Stefani. You've released 8,000 singles this year. Oh, and the "walk, walk fashion baby" part is fucking epic!

6. "You Belong with Me" by Taylor Swift

It's not Taylor Swift if it's not corny. Corny is good.

5. "Empire State of Mind" by Jay-Z Featuring Alicia Keys

A song 'bout New York City? Gotta love it. Duh.

4. "I Gotta Feeling" by Black Eyed Peas

Every day is a Friday! Time to party!

3. "Try Sleeping with a Broken Heart" by Alicia Keys

Gosh, she really really really misses that person, huh?

2. "D.O.A. (Death of Auto-Tune)" by Jay-Z

The song samples a composition by some French dudes and it's crazy good!

1. "Use Somebody" by Kings of Leon

The voice, baby. It's all about the voice.

Thoughts? What are your favorite songs of 2009? Notably ignored: Sean Kingston. Thank you.

XOXO!

COMING UP!

2009-12-31T16:32:00.000+08:00

Stay connected!

XOXO!

BEST OF 2009 (PART DEUX)

2009-12-29T15:37:00.023+08:00

We cried, we screamed in horror and we pissed our pants laughing. Here's part 2 of the "Best of 2009" series, Get Gossipy™ 10 BEST MOVIES OF 2009. Check them out, folks!

10. "Paranormal Activity"
PARAMOUNT PICTURES / DREAMWORKS SKG

WHY?: Everybody loves the underdog and the movie proves that by becoming the highest grossing R-rated movie so far.

SECOND TAKE: You can't really see the ghost. They're fucking with your mind and trust me, it will scare the shit out of you. One more thing, Micah has that stupid alpha male ego and boy, oh boy, it's great to watch him act all brave and in control.

BEST SCENE: Katie stands by the bed and stares at Micah for several hours.

DOWNSIDES: Micah is way too brave it's creepy; and too many versions of the movie ending can be quite a downer.

9. "The Hangover"
WARNER BROS. PICTURES

WHY?: Bromance galore.

SECOND TAKE: This is by far the sleeper hit (read: surprise hit) of 2009. The premise is simple, four buddies go to Las Vegas... and it all goes downhill from there. With surprisingly rave reviews from the critics, it might get one of the ten spots for Best Picture nominations in next year's Oscars... A long shot, but possible.

BEST SCENE: Any scene with Alan Garner (played by Zach Galifianakis) in it.

DOWNSIDE: The tiger sub-plot is a little flimsy.

8. "The Blind Side"
WARNER BROS. PICTURES

WHY?: Sandra Bullock's role of a lifetime (as a Southern ~~cougar~~ mom).

SECOND TAKE: It's always nice to watch a feel-good based-on-a-true-story drama. Well, like they say, what's white is right.

BEST SCENES: Quinton Aaron's (as Michael "Big Mike" Oher) laundromat scene in the beginning and towards the end of the movie (with Sandra Bullock).

DOWNSIDE: More Tim McGraw, please, please, please!

7. "Zombieland"
COLUMBIA PICTURES

WHY?: A new take on zombie movies.

SECOND TAKE: Trust and mistrust are parts of life. The zombies are just like the bad people around us -- they want to see us suffer or kill us or eat us alive, figuratively. That's the basis of the movie. Gosh, Dr. Phil, much?

BEST SCENES: Funny-as-hell Bill Murray scene; and the visually orgasmic opening credits.

DOWNSIDE: It boggles me as to why Wichita and Little Rock have to take the drop tower ride. Why? Why? Why?

6. "Up"
WALT DISNEY PICTURES

WHY?: Nobody says no to computer-animated movies. Duh.

SECOND TAKE: The best part about Pixar movies is that they do not make computer animation for the sake of making them, they inject souls and moral values as well. Both adults and children can relate to that. Russell (voiced by Jordan Nagai) is both funny and innocent, he will definitely make you laugh and obviously the star of the show.

BEST SCENE: The almost-silent montage of the life of Carl Fredricksen is a sob-fest.

DOWNSIDE: Check your logic at the door. If not, don't ask questions about the floating house suspended from helium balloons.

5. "(500) Days of Summer"
FOX SEARCHLIGHT PICTURES

WHY?: The writers put parentheses around the 500. Okay, maybe not that. It's one of the best 'failed romance' movies I've seen in years.

SECOND TAKE: The non-linear narrative works for this movie and it makes you not want to sleep. Summer Flint (played by Zooey Deschanel) is sarcastic and annoying, I love her!

BEST SCENES: When Tom Hansen (played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt) talks about Summer Finn's flaws when he's head over heels in love with her, everything seems perfect; but when it turns sour, the flaws, are in fact flaws and he hates them. That's real life.

DOWNSIDE: The disclaimer at the beginning of the movie, "Any resemblance to people living or dead is purely accidental... Especially you, Jenny Beckman... Bitch." is a bit tacky and gimmicky.

4. "Precious: Based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire"
LIONSGATE

WHY?: One word. Mo'Nique.

SECOND TAKE: Mariah Carey, de-glittered. Lenny Kravitz's a nurse. Paula Patton ~~eats pussy~~ makes me want to be an educator. Gabourey Sidibe is the best choice for the role of Precious Jones. I cannot think of anybody else who's fitting for the role. You look into her eyes and you will see that she tries to tell us that she doesn't want to back down, but she feels like giving up. There's a Precious in all of us.

BEST SCENE: The last scene in the welfare office, where Mo'Nique single-handedly holds her own and tells the world that the Oscar is mine. Better be mine.

DOWNSIDE: Precious' fantasies sometimes come out of nowhere.

3. "Avatar"
TWENTIETH CENTURY FOX

WHY?: If your eyes could have sex, they will thank you.

SECOND TAKE: A big gamble for James Cameron to make the most expensive movie in the history of filmmaking. Well, it's worth it -- every single penny. It's amazing to see the technology they have to capture the micro-expressions of these actors and the movie is a fresh take on the classic story of greed, power and manipulation. I think Giovanni Ribisi is a little young to be a corporate administrator, Parker Selfridge, but he did a great job because I feel that I want to smack his pretty face! Now, now, a little advice, do not make a sequel. I will fuck your brain out James Cameron. Do. Not.

BEST SCENES: Goddammit, the whole effing movie! These blue people have nice teeth. Okay, random.

DOWNSIDE: Do any of you find it disturbing that most of the blue people are modeled after black people?

2. "Where the Wild Things Are"
WARNER BROS. PICTURES

WHY?: It brings back memories of our morbid fascination with monsters when we were little kids.

SECOND TAKE: I have to admit, it's a little dark for small kids and that's why the movie didn't transform into box-office success, but it's not really a dud. Trust me, 10 years from now, this movie is going to be a cult favorite. The best part is that, they use animatronics, so the 'monsters' do 'exist' and they don't look special FX-y. The "New Moon" FX team should learn a thing or two about making believable wolves. Max Records is a gem and I can see a bright future for this child actor. I'm still in awe as to how Spike Jonze stretches a relatively short children's book into 100 minutes of fantasy movie. Kudos.

BEST SCENE: The dirt-clod fight.

DOWNSIDE: More Catherine Keener, please!

1. "Inglourious Basterds"
THE WEINSTEIN COMPANY / UNIVERSAL PICTURES

WHY?: Christoph Waltz's outstanding performance as Standartenführer Hans Landa (aka The Jew Hunter) alone is enough to justify this amazing picture.

SECOND TAKE: As a characters-driven movie, this fictional war story has hit every level of awesomeness. With a big ensemble cast, Quentin Tarantino doesn't act as the characters traffic controller, but instead, each character and every plot (and sub-plot) interweave nicely in a gory big package. I'm blown away by Waltz's Landa manipulative character. As the 'bad guy' and a schadenfreude (read: a person who finds pleasures in seeing others' misfortunes), he seems very composed (SPOILER: He only breaks down at the end of the movie) and you get this idea that he knows everything, but he's actually messing with your mind. An Oscar win is a sure-thing and I bet my money on him. And of course, the charm of this movie, the scalping scenes -- they are going to make you queasy.

BEST SCENES: The tavern shoot-out; and the nerve-wrecking Shosanna-Landa ~~smackdown~~ conversation in the Parisian restaurant.

DOWNSIDE: Lt. Aldo Raine's (played by Brad Pitt) funny accent.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:
"Star Trek" (PARAMOUNT PICTURES)
"The September Issue" (ROADSIDE ATTRACTIONS)
"The Hurt Locker" (SUMMIT ENTERTAINMENT)
"Adventureland" (MIRAMAX FILMS)
"The Proposal" (TOUCHSTONE PICTURES)

Thoughts? What's your favorite movie this year?

XOXO!

LES FILMS!

2009-12-29T12:00:00.005+08:00

Are you guys ready?

XOXO!

I MISS YOU, SHELDON COOPER!

2009-12-29T10:19:00.008+08:00

The cast of "The Big Bang Theory" played dress up for EW photoshoot. Sheldon's looking dapper and Penny is so cute! Gosh, I can't even remember their real names. Click here, here and here for more.

XOXO!

BLAME IT ON THE POP!

2009-12-29T09:53:00.004+08:00

This is awesome!

XOXO!

BEST OF 2009 (PART UNE)

2009-12-28T23:29:00.012+08:00

Okay folks, here's the first part of a 3-part "Best of 2009" series, Get Gossipy™ 10 BEST ALBUMS OF 2009. Albums should be released within the 'eligibility period' -- between December 25, 2008 until December 24, 2009 -- in order to make the cut. Yes, technically, there are 11 albums in this list. I just couldn't decide. Check them out.

10. "(500) Days of Summer" (SOUNDTRACK) & "New Moon" (SOUNDTRACK)
VARIOUS ARTISTS

I don't usually favor soundtracks because these big movie honchos would just throw in a few songs and put them in a fancy packaging. I decided to rank these two sountrack albums at No. 10 because they're equally great. "(500) Days of Summer" takes more of a hopeful and quirky approach in its song collection, while "New Moon" is darker and it gives you that wet and rainy feel. Regina Spektor shines in "(500)" and Carla bruni (yes, the Carla Bruni) makes a little musical cameo in this album. In "Moon," Death Cab For Cutie stands out from the rest; and a composition by Alexandre Desplat will make you want to be lost in the (wet) woods and be saved by ~~Sharkboy~~ Jacob Black. Too bad, I personally think that "New Moon" is one of the worst movies I've seen this year.

STANDOUT TRACKS (500 DAYS OF SUMMER): "Us," "Hero" & "Bad Kids"

STANDOUT TRACKS (NEW MOON): "Meet Me on the Equinox" & "New Moon (The Meadow)"

9. "21st Century Breakdown"
GREEN DAY

An opus about two young lovers, Christian & Gloria. This album is not as politically-driven as their last effort, but the vibe is pretty much the same. Once again, the band knows what the fans want and they know their niche -- high energy rock ballads. They're (the rock ballads, I mean) not the mushy type, but more of that in-your-face so-what-I'm-in-love type. And, oh God, they're old. Old old.

STANDOUT TRACKS: "21 Guns," "Before the Lobotomy" & "21st Century Breakdown"

8. "The Element of Freedom"
ALICIA KEYS

On to her fourth studio album, Alicia Keys still sounds mesmerizing. She sings about love and relationships, and that makes the premise of the album simple and relatable. She is one of those artists who does not need over-the-top and gimmicky productions to make heads turn. I say yes to this R&B smorgasbord.

STANDOUT TRACKS: "Try Sleeping with a Broken Heart," "Doesn't Mean Anything" & "Put It in a Love Song"

7. "Ocean Eyes"
OWL CITY

Adam Young has been in the music business for quite some time now and now he gets his big break with the single "Fireflies." Meant to be an experimental album and what I would call a 'techno mush,' the album soars into mellow electronic greatness throughout. Listen to the album and you'll know what I mean.

STANDOUT TRACKS: "Fireflies" & "Tidal Wave"

6. "She Wolf"
SHAKIRA

It's common for an artist to sprinkle a little sex in an album, but to take it to another level, it takes guts (and a lot of moaning). Shakira knows how keep the sexy mood going and she has this je ne sais quoi quality that is obviously used to her advantage. Awkward lyrics aside, the album further proves that sex indeed sells.

STANDOUT TRACKS: "Good Stuff" & "She Wolf"

5. "The Blueprint 3"
JAY-Z

The virtuoso of rap music presents us with another solid album and he is now more accessible than ever. With the help of his famous featured artists -- not uncommon for a rap album -- Jay-Z tells his story so smoothly in each song and the music sampling this time around is just rad. But, the biggest question here is that whether he's still got it post-"retirement?" Yep, Jigga still got it. No doubt.

STANDOUT TRACKS: "Empire State of Mind," "D.O.A. (Death of Auto-Tune)" & "A Star is Born"

4. "The Fame Monster"
LADY GAGA

By now, I believe people have already known my blatant annoyance toward Lady Gaga, but she strikes gold and shines with this album (technically, this is an eight-track EP). The album is sex for the ears from start to finish (well, I believe that's her intention in the first place) and her lyrics could go from vague to unapologetic sexual double-entendres. She might be the dance-floor savior that we've been waiting for.

STANDOUT TRACKS: "Dance in the Dark," "Alejandro" & "Bad Romance"

3. "Rated R"
RIHANNA

She wasn't kidding about taking that edgier and rock-oriented (Slash!) direction in this album. "Rated R" is obviously a darker opus compared to her previous efforts, but it has a glimmer of hope and faith. Oh, and that domestic-violence saga did help. You opportunistic bitch.

STANDOUT TRACKS: "Russian Roulette," "Wait Your Turn," "Fire Bomb" & "Hard"

2. "The Resistance"
MUSE

Seriously? A three-part symphony? Pure genius. Matthew Bellamy's forced cynical voice should be bottled up and put in a museum. The outer space-y vibe in this album is a devastatingly immaculate work of artistic flair -- take that Spin, and yes, you can quote me! They should start a cult. Thank you.

STANDOUT TRACKS: "Uprising," "Undisclosed Desires," "Exogenesis: Symphony Part 1 (Overture)" & "Resistance"

1. "The E.N.D."
BLACK EYED PEAS

HERE YOU GO: The best fucking album this year! "The E.N.D." is ridiculously catchy and almost every song should be a radio staple. The electronic dance songs are all deliciously layered with Auto-Tune goodness and they will blow your fucking mind. Fergie definitely balances the group dynamics with a female vocal and man, she can sing (albeit not great). Okay, you might think that I sound sarcastic, but they were never here to make great music, they are here to create over-the-top disposable musical indulgence that would make us bop along in euphoria. Just like fattening food, you eat it, feel guilty and repeat.

STANDOUT TRACKS: "I Gotta Feeling," "Imma Be," "Alive," "Meet Me Halfway" & "Missing You"

HONORABLE MENTIONS:
"The Spell" by Alphabeat
"One Love" by David Guetta
"Far" by Regina Spektor
"Man on the Moon: The End of Day" by Kid Cudi
"brand new eyes" by Paramore

Thoughts? What's your favorite album of the year?

XOXO!

MORE TO COME!

2009-12-27T23:02:00.003+08:00

Stay connected!

XOXO!

THE DECADE-END LIST

2009-12-27T21:41:00.014+08:00

This time around, we're going to look at the 15 THINGS THAT SHAPED THE NOUGHTIES (read: 00's). That's 10 years of pure roller-coaster ride of popular culture and I'm up for another 10. Do you?

15. OCD IN MEDIA

Adrian Monk bade adieu to his fans last December to embark on a syndication glory; Bree van de Kamp's demise might be possible in Desperate Housewives' mid-season cliffhanger; and Sheldon is still... well, Sheldon. These characters (and many more) are so recognizable and familiar to us and they have opened our eyes to the world of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. And they make me feel like I'm not suffering from OCD alone.

14. PLUTO, BOOTED

People are actually petitioning to get our little Pluto its planet status back. It is now a 'dwarf planet.' Yeah, it's like saying that, "You've just been re-elected as the president, but you have no power."

13. SINGER-SONGWRITERS

These singers are what the boy bands were to the 90's. They're everywhere!

12. INDIE MOVIES

The very definition of an indie movie is that it has to be low-budget and depressingly slow-moving. Napoleon Dynamite might cross your mind when we talk about indie movies (Vote for Pedro!). The story lines are all almost identical: a dweeb likes a girl, the girl doesn't know his existence, the dweeb does something romantic or sweet and gets the girl in the end. Or the protagonist's an aspiring writer/singer/actor who tries to get a big break... And after a long tumultuous journey to being a star, he gets his big break, natch.

11. THE FLU

Most overrated, but feared. Just like a creepy neighbor who gives you that spiteful look, but he's actually harmless. Okay, that's not a good analogy.

10. THE IRAQ WAR

The most expensive, good-for-nothing war in the history of mankind. Thank you, Bush.

9. USB FLASH DRIVES

They used to be expensive, but now everybody can afford them. They are the floppy disks of the noughties.

8. REHAB

Amy, Lindsay and Pete. They've all gone there. It's the Disneyland for adults. Drinking too much? You go there. Having too much sex? Get yourself in. Snorting ganja before (and after) every meal? Pay, and get better. But the truth is, you will not get better. In celebritydom, they have another word for rehab, it's called 'damage control.'

7. 'LEAKED' PERSONAL PHOTOS & VIDEOS

In this era, everybody can be on TV and in the movies. What sets you apart from the rest is that little PR stunts called 'nude photos' and 'sex tapes.' Just ask Paris or Vanessa, they will give you a pointer or two.

6. JANET JACKSON'S RIGHT BOOB

Why show some cleavage when you can go all-out and expose your areola? Janet single-handedly changed the regulation of indecency on live broadcasting in 2004 during a Super Bowl halftime performance with Justin Timberlake. A nipple-shield and a public apology later, the term 'wardrobe malfunction' was coined.

5. iGENERATION
From iBook to iPod. And iPhone to iPoop. Apple made 'i' the new 'e' in less than a decade.

4. THE SOUTH ASIAN TSUNAMI
11 countries. 100 feet high. 283,100 deaths. 14,100 are still missing. That's enough to paint the picture.

3. YouTube

Who would have thought that you could share an 8-minute video of your dog chasing its own tail with the whole world? This is Generation Y's very own AFV.

2. SOCIAL NETWORKING SITES

The culture of knowing people that you have never met in person. Well, (online) stalking is the new mingling.

1. 9/11

The day the world literally stopped and stunned the whole world. It was the day that started it all off -- conspiracy theories, Islamophobia and the hunt of a man named Osama.

Did I miss anything out? Share your thoughts.

XOXO!

CHILLING EFFECTS

2009-12-24T07:11:00.008+08:00

Sweet mother of God! Talk about bad timing. A massive recall has been made on Brittany Murphy's recently released direct-to-DVD movie, "Deadline" due to the ~~inappropriate~~ creepy cover artwork. I'm sure they do this out of deference... Or maybe for publicity. I'm just saying...

To those who are still living under the rock, here's the 411, she was found dead in the bathtub of her LA home a few days ago. Get the picture? OMG, pun intended!

Well, sometimes, art does imitate life.

XOXO!

TAI FRAISER'S IN MY HEART!

2009-12-21T05:25:00.009+08:00

You know what time is it? It's time to do the whole back catalog thing. I'm going to watch Brittany Murphy's movies now. Oh wait, I've watched 'em all... Except for "Little Black Book." Yeah, I should watch that. You know it's funny that we don't really care about certain famous people until they're dead? But Brittany was recently on the news for getting fired from a movie, so she's kinda fresh in my mind.

I guess some people can't take being unemployed. Okay, that's harsh. Don't hold it against me. I love her! She always giggled and smiled!

So, listen kids, that's what drugs can do to you -- whether you're famous or not.

Thank you. ~~This has been a great public service announcement.~~

XOXO!

I'LL NEVER TELL...

2009-12-21T04:36:00.005+08:00

RIP
Brittany Murphy
November 10, 1977 – December 20, 2009

I'm in shock! My heart goes out to her family and friends. She was only 32. So young, so soon.

XOXO!

OLD RECORD

2009-12-08T05:44:00.007+08:00

I was busy YouTubing and I stumbled upon this video. Guess what song sampled the song above? The person with the right answer will get a sexy spanking from me.

XOXO!

HINT: The song caused a messy $500 million dollars copyright lawsuit back in 2002.

MORE TO COME!

2009-12-08T05:03:00.005+08:00

Guess what, I'm working on my dissertation, dealing with four year-end lists for my blog and trying so hard to calm myself down when I start thinking about that bloody practicum. Life's a bitch!

Shit.

XOXO!

LITTLE BALL OF FUR

2009-11-27T01:48:00.006+08:00

Can someone give Jim Parsons an Emmy already? He got snubbed this year because of Alec Baldwin. Yup. Alec. Baldwin.

While they're at it, why don't they just throw in some Oscars and a Tony? You know what they say, making jokes is harder than dying. And soon I'm gonna die of too much laughing. OCPD and Asperger syndrome could never look this good (and funny!).

He can be my roommate anyfuckingtime! And now, every night before I sleep, I would sing the Soft Kitty song and tell myself that some other people suffer far worse OCD syndrome than I am.

Thank you.

XOXO!

FOOTNOTE: Thanks Linda for hooking me up with the Bang. Pun intended.

CATTY BUSINESS

2009-11-11T14:50:00.010+08:00

The newly released "Alice in Wonderland" poster is awesome. And that Cheshire Cat is creeping the fuck out of me. To me, the cat looks like a sweaty old paedophile who stalks your little sister on her way back from school and please do not get me started on that sinister smile. I'm scared of this cat and also that lazy-eyed ~~elephant~~ mammoth (Snuffleupagus?) on Sesame Street.

Fuck.

XOXO!

BAD ROMANCE

2009-11-11T13:54:00.003+08:00

The video is epic, but I'm so over her. Next!

XOXO!

WHATCHA SAY

2009-11-07T04:40:00.008+08:00

This is the No. 1 song in America right now. They sure love their 'disposable' music, right? Pretty annoying song (read: drenched in AutoTuned vocal) by Jason DeRulo, but it will definitely grow on you. The song samples Imogen Heap's "Hide and Seek." Click here to listen to it in all its original glory. Why isn't anybody making 'real' music anymore?

AutoTune kills music (yes, Mariah, don't duck your head, I'm talking to you). And sampling kills music too (yes, I'm talking about all the Diddys, Eminems and Lil Waynes out there).

XOXO!

ANY PUBLICITY IS GOOD PUBLICITY

2009-11-07T04:08:00.012+08:00

HEADLINE OF THE MOMENT: RIHANNA SPEAKS OUT ON ASSAULT, BROWN CAMP FIRES BACK. Click here for further reading.

Let the war begin.

XOXO!

BREAKING HER SILENCE

2009-11-07T01:53:00.007+08:00

In the picture, Rihanna is seen ~~making a thought-provoking face~~ pouring her heart out to Diane Sawyer. I love her, but I can't help but wonder, "Why now?" Conveniently when her new album comes out this month.

You can search the videos of the Rihanna/Sawyer's Good Morning America interview on YouTube.

Happy hunting!

XOXO!

I really dig her second single, "Wait Your Turn." Can't stop humming to that song.

THE ICE QUEEN

2009-11-03T23:07:00.004+08:00

Happy birthday, Anna Wintour! Hey, you have my job!

XOXO!

BED FIGHT!

2009-11-01T05:44:00.009+08:00

Can Shakira get any more awesome than this? My jaw dropped when I first saw the video.

Beyoncé, who?

XOXO!

TAYLOR SQUARED

2009-10-30T19:24:00.004+08:00

Sharkboy and T-Swizzle went on a date. How cute!

XOXO!

WORK IT, DUDE!

2009-10-30T02:20:00.006+08:00

WHAT THE FUCK!?

Emporio Armani never looked so ~~good~~ gross. Khairy Jamaluddin is definitely giving a run for Tyra's money, but the bigger question here:

Is cowl-neck making a comeback?

A moment of silence, please. Today is the day fashion dies.

XOXO!

DESPERATELY SEEKING SUSAN

2009-10-30T01:28:00.004+08:00

I just read the news that Marc Cherry has extended his contract until 2013. "Desperate Housewives" is going to be around for quite a while. It's almost unbearable to watch. I think they should just end it now. While they're at it, why don't they just axe all the vampire-centric series. They're getting on my nerves.

Oh how I miss all the good shows of the 90's.

Thank you.

XOXO!

HIS GREATNESS

2009-10-29T23:44:00.005+08:00

I don't know whether the editing or the opportunists behind the money-making empire that make the documentary so great and magical, but all I know is that I saw a high-spirited, humble and positive entertainer right in front of me in the screening hall. Michael Jackson was so great and that's an understatement!

Just got back from watching the documentary and all of the songs featured are still ringing in my ears. People actually started applauding at the end of the documentary and I felt like I was in an LA premiere or something. They should give him a standing-o too! Never thought Malaysians are into this kind of thing.

I give the documentary two thumbs up. Michael Jackson was and will always be great and relevant. He is the king of pop, indeed.

XOXO!

RATED F(IERCE)

2009-10-28T03:12:00.005+08:00

Rihanna's just revealed the cover of her forthcoming album, "Rated R."

1 word. Intense.

If the first single, "Russian Roulette" is any indication, the whole album might be going for the suicidal vibe (or maybe the whole 'hell hath no fury like a woman scorned' theme).

Can't fucking wait!

XOXO!

SASHA SHH!

2009-10-25T04:33:00.005+08:00

I'm banning Beyoncé from playing in my iTunes for the next 2 weeks starting today! Yay.

Thank you.

XOXO!

GREAT EXPERIENCE!

2009-10-23T00:51:00.064+08:00

STARBUCKS BARISTA
August 4, 2008 - October 22, 2009

I've been trying to post this entry days ago, but I couldn't get myself to click the 'Publish Post' button because I was just way too sad. I've met a lot of people along the journey -- both good and bad people -- and they are all wonderful and weird! Am I making any sense here? It was definitely one of the best times of my life and I will forever remember it!

No more jelly in this coffee.

I want all my ~~co-workers~~ partners to have grande lives ahead of them and seriously, you guys are so fucking amazing! Good luck in your future undertakings, people! I know it's going to be weird for me to come to Starbucks and not getting the 30% discounts, but I need those caramel macchiatos to stay alive. Yes, I've successfully made myself sound like a poser. Bite me.

One chapter of my life closes, another one begins -- The Practicum!

Wish me all the luck in the world.

XOXO!

TIGHTER THAN MY DERÉON JEANS

2009-10-20T04:17:00.004+08:00

Dear Beyoncé,

I'm writing this friendly missive just to thank you. Thank you for snubbing us once again. It has been a great pleasure to be erotically and emotionally teased by your persistent fickle-mindedness. I know, I know, it's just a postponement (Rihanna, who?) and you're a busy girl. Paris, now, Tokyo the next morning. PAS people are to blame. They've been giving us all these big speeches on hedonistic lifestyles and whatnot when the truth is that they actually jerk off to your bootylicious pictures on the Internet with "Crazy in Love" playing in the background. Your jizz-inducing voice is really making them go crazy and thanks to them, Avril Lavigne is now the God of goth because nothing is more immoral than singing songs that are overly sugarcoated and annoyingly repetitive. She's really put Barney (and friends) to shame.

Oh, am I taking too much of your time? I think I'm going to stop now. You can go have fun with your "scheduling conflict" and send my regards to Gareth Pugh. He's probably blowing his mind off making new, less revealing outfit. Tough luck, dude! I think it's time for you to rock them burkas, don't you think? Singing "Single Ladies" in a burka? That would give some people something to think about, eh?

See you on the flipside!

Regards,

Ridhwan

3

2009-09-30T00:41:00.000+08:00

BREAKING NEWS! Britney can count to three!

Click here to listen to Britney's latest 'musical' opus about threesome from her upcoming compilation album, "The Singles Collection."

The kids going to be proud of their mommy!

XOXO!

UNCHAINED MELODY

2009-09-16T01:51:00.001+08:00

A tribute.

XOXO!

HOW TO BURN YOUR SALARY

2009-09-15T23:13:00.003+08:00

After months of anticipation, MPH finally called and asked me to collect the (pre-ordered) book. Now I'm all excited and can't wait to start reading, but first I've to finish the bloody assignments.

Okay, maybe I should only read 20 pages and then continue with the assignments.

Brilliant.

XOXO!

DIRTY DANCER

2009-09-15T11:24:00.000+08:00

RIP
Patrick Swayze
(August 18, 1952 – September 14, 2009)

THIS IS FUCKING CLASSIC!

2009-09-15T04:25:00.004+08:00

"It's not true." Ha ha.

Look at McCain's face. Priceless!

Whoever did this video is a motherfucking genius.

XOXO!

JUST. SHOOT. ME.

2009-09-13T04:38:00.002+08:00

Oh jyeah! I can't stop listening to Muse's new album. One word. ~~Epic~~ Monumental.

Oh, can I just not do all the frickin' assignments? I am totally not in the mood. Heck, I don't even have the mood to update this blog.

Dayyum.

XOXO!

LOL-WORTHY

2009-09-09T23:53:00.004+08:00

ROTFLMAO!

XOXO!

FASTER, PUSSYCAT!

2009-08-31T13:28:00.005+08:00

Snow Leopard's currently sold out in all machines™ outlets. Gonna have to wait for a few more days.

~~Fuck~~ Darn.

XOXO!

52.

2009-08-31T02:58:00.008+08:00

HAPPY MERDEKA!

THE TOP 10

2009-08-19T19:07:00.006+08:00

Britney whored it out on The Late Show with David Letterman. No. 4 was definitely a jab at her dad (and obviously Obama) and No.1 was her making fun of the media.

Ha ha.

XOXO!

EATS, SHITES & LEAVES

2009-08-18T22:25:00.007+08:00

After much deliberation and a long talk with my attorney, I've decided to pull the entry that I've posted earlier this morning entitled, "PANDA EATS SHOOTS & LEAVES" from my blog.

Thank you.

And oh, this makes my day.

XOXO!

15

2009-08-18T11:34:00.002+08:00

I'm sure by now you guys have heard about the Pete Teo's short film project, 15Malaysia. Yesterday, the first short film, "Potong Saga" was released and made available for free download at the official site. I've got to say that I'm very optimistic about this whole project. The first short film by Ho Yuhang is funny and I just love the title! Can't wait for Yasmin Ahmad's "Chocolate" (August 19)!

Go download!

And click here to see the release dates of all 15 short films.

XOXO!

SUMMER 'DO!

2009-08-17T23:55:00.000+08:00

Sean Preston & Jayden James get new buzz cuts. No more of that bowl cut, I guess.

How adorable!

XOXO!

WELCOME BACK!

2009-08-08T01:29:00.005+08:00

Ah crap. I've got the bloody fever and the flu. Not again! Gonna go for checkup later. I'm feeling numb and effing ~~hot~~ clammy!

XOXO!

PRETTY BETTY

2009-08-06T04:34:00.003+08:00

The show "Ugly Betty" is taking a new direction next season -- the long-awaited makeover.

Do you like the new Betty?

XOXO!

THE LIST

2009-08-06T03:20:00.013+08:00

That's it! Do not let me hear that Na Na Na song ever again! You know that feeling when you just want to pull your hair out when you hear annoying songs from annoying singers? So I thought I make a list of THE TOP 10 MOST ANNOYING SINGERS OF ALL TIME. This is strictly my personal opinion. Deal with it.

1. AKON
His trademarked clanging sound of a cell door closing is as annoying as Jermaine Dupri's "Y'all know what this is?" Don't get me started on his voice.

2. SEAN KINGSTON
"Somebody call 911, shawty fire burning on the dance floor." Somebody shoot me. Like now. Oh, and he looks like a 6-foot tall baby. Scary!

3. JESSICA SIMPSON
There is no word to describe her voice. Wait, there is -- CONSTIPATED.

4. GÜNTHER
If this doesn't annoy the crap out of you than I don't know what is.

5. VANESSA HUDGENS
Her nasally and naggy voice is like your granny trying to wake you up for school. Go back to acting, V. I forgot. You can't act too.

6. MARIAH CAREY
She has redefined the term "vocal acrobatics," but in a bad way.

7. 50 CENT
I don't know how to explain this. He seems very awkward when he's rapping, especially when it comes to mushy lovey stuff. He's so awkward, it's like watching a sex scene with your parents. Must be the steroids.

8. JOHN MAYER
J. Simpson 2.0, much?

9. FLO RIDA
Why is he famous anyway?

10. LADY GAGA
I started to get annoyed with her just recently. Those over-the-top get-ups are looking a little less avant-garde, a little more like publicity stunts to me. Yes, she can sing (in fact, she's epic, just like in this performance), but her supposedly quirky persona drowns her talent. And what's with her and talking bull? Lady G, there's a thin line between being nonchalant and plain batshit. Thank you.

There you go. The 10 most annoying singers according to me. Do you have any singer that you find very annoying?

XOXO!

1. YEAR.

2009-08-04T14:10:00.008+08:00

Starbucks Barista
August 4, 2008 - August 4, 2009
(ONE YEAR)

Gosh, y'all! Today marks my one year on the job in ~~Berjaya Starbucks Coffee Company Sdn Bhd~~ Starbucks. Time really flies, huh. Gonna resign soon. Better drink them free Frapp while I can.

XOXO!

A VISIONARY. A LEGEND. MY HERO(INE).

2009-07-26T11:58:00.001+08:00

AL-FATIHAH

RIP

Yasmin Ahmad
~~(aka Zulkifli Ahmad)~~
July 1, 1958 - July 25, 2009

I am devastated. Why do people get so judgemental? Honor her legacy and respect her family. She's one of a kind.

Thank you.

XOXO!

NOTE TO SELF: People are going to talk shit about you even if you were Gandhi. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. Believe in yourself. C'est la vie.

RIHRIH REBOUND!

2009-07-25T01:01:00.004+08:00

Click here to listen to Jay-Z's new single "Run This Town" featuring Rihanna and Kanye West. I'm digging it.

It's Rihanna first single post-Brown snafu. Good to know that she's still making music.

XOXO!

ALICE IN WONDERLAND

2009-07-25T00:42:00.006+08:00

I'm all giddy and excited! The teaser trailer for Tim Burton's "Alice in Wonderland" has leaked. This movie is beyond disturbing and kinda dark. Anne Hathaway's gonna be so awesome. And Johnny Depp... well, need I say more?

The cat gives me the creeps.

XOXO!

OF MEN, WOMEN & AFFOGATO

2009-07-24T12:40:00.006+08:00

It's been a while. I've been really ~~busy~~ lazy. Here are some (interesting) updates:

1. Okay. Seriously, I don't get all the fuss some ~~girls~~ women are making on wanting to be like men or equal to men. Gosh, you girls get to have multiple orgasms. I think that should be enough. And 264 feminists all over the world are plotting to assassinate me right about... now.

2. Say hi to my 6-inch forehead! No, it's not a myth.
After weeks of that side fringe thingy, I thought of trying something ~~new~~ different. Side-parting cum back-combing!

3. NEW OBSESSION ALERT! Starbucks Venti Extra Caramel Drizzle, Extra Whipped Cream, Caramel Cream Frappuccino Blended Cream Affogato Style. That's a mouthful. Why hello, Mr. Heart Failure!

4. Not working for almost a month is not good for my body (and my pocket). I can seriously say that I forgot how to prepare some of the principal Starbucks beverages. Shit!

5. Daughtry's new album is almost epic.

6. I'm obsessing over Weezer's "King" right now. The song gives me that "Hotel California" vibe. 1 word. Orgasmic.

7. The H1N1 scare last week was really... well, scary. But the doc was really nice. We should go on a date or something.

8. And by the way, Shakespeare can rot in hell.

XOXO!

IF TODAY WAS A SONG: "King" by Weezer

SPELLING BEE!

2009-07-23T23:48:00.000+08:00

Learn how to spell, please.

Seriously, siapa yang bebal ni?

XOXO!

The 'graffiti' can be found in the toilet near MARA Food Court.

LOST KOREAN TOURIST!

2009-07-14T22:00:00.005+08:00

Responsible citizen, no?

XOXO!

IF TODAY WAS A SONG: "Sweet Dreams" by Beyoncé

THE RARITY

2009-07-14T00:09:00.006+08:00

A never-before-seen childhood photo of Prince Michael and Paris Jackson. How cute!

XOXO!

ALL'S WELL!

2009-07-13T23:44:00.005+08:00

UPDATE: According to Azmir, Nad has almost fully recovered. Do the happy dance now, peeps! She's now ~~on house arrest~~ self-quarantining herself at home.

Alhamdulillah.

XOXO!

THE FEVER

2009-07-12T21:03:00.000+08:00

Dear Nad,
GET WELL SOON!

Speedy recovery!

XOXO!

I have to go for the H1N1 medical checkup. Just in case.

TAKE ME FROM BEHIND

2009-07-09T17:45:00.009+08:00

"I'm a virgin. How would I know
what a facial is." (Melissa Cherry, 2008)

She's epic! Click here to watch the full interview from The Onion Movie.

Thank you.

Thanks Aafin for letting me know about Melissa Cherry!

HOME SWEET HOME

2009-07-01T04:51:00.005+08:00

Gonna be away for awhile.

Buh-bye.

THE TIME TRAVELER'S WIFE

2009-06-29T02:44:00.005+08:00

The movie looks great. Definitely gonna watch it.

Thank you.

BACKSLIDE!

2009-06-28T05:10:00.005+08:00

Enough with the mourning. Let's celebrate the King with moonwalking and a new header.

God bless!

Bleh.

BLACK OR WHITE

2009-06-27T06:04:00.003+08:00

GOOD MOURNING!

THE LOSS

2009-06-26T08:38:00.004+08:00

RIP
Michael Joseph Jackson
(August 29, 1958 - June 25, 2009)

XOXO!

21 GUNS

2009-06-26T03:43:00.004+08:00

I love Green Day sampai bila-bila!

XOXO!

OF OOMPA-LOOMPAS, AUTOBOTS & DECEPTICONS

2009-06-26T02:40:00.010+08:00

Went to see "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" with my housemates, Alief & Alvin (sans Fahmi & Pali) just now. It's been an amazingly busy week and I actually thought that I won't be able to watch the movie. DP looked like a frickin' refugee camp with throngs of ~~people~~ fanboys came in and out to see Megan Fox did a little soft porn. Okay, don't kill me. I just think that she looks like a tranny all the time.

Love the movie!

Some critics called it excessive and all, but sometimes over-the-top is good. The feast for the eyes. Them critics are just grumpy old farts who are hard to please anyway. I just want Shia to get more screen time. That's all. Other than that, I'm not complaining. I'm a happy camper, y'all!

Did you guys see the Oompa-Loompa? Go Yankees! LOL!

XOXO!

Okay, maybe the storyline is a bit flimsy compared to the first movie. Agree?

THE ORIGINAL ANGEL

2009-06-26T02:29:00.005+08:00

RIP
Farrah Fawcett
(February 2, 1947 - June 25, 2009)

XOXO!

PLUS 5

2009-06-25T14:43:00.006+08:00

This is the best piece of news I've heard all week! Oscar Best Picture category expands to 10 nominees starting next year! More nominations mean bigger chances for the unpopular genres -- Sci-Fi, comic book adaptation, animation, teen flick, chick flick, et cetera -- to get nominated. Do the happy dance now! Click here for more.

Does this mean 17 Again might have a shot at being nominated? I doubt it.

XOXO!

RIP BOBBI!

2009-06-23T02:25:00.008+08:00

(NOT SO) BREAKING NEWS!

Bobbi dah mati! Bobbi dah mati! Bobbi dah mati!

~~Mayat~~ Bangkai dijumpai dalam longkang depan Restoran Satay Celup. Bukan salah saya. Saya tak bunuh that bitch okay! Siasatan sedang dijalankan.

I need my lawyer and manager, pronto! And mon PR, Aafin... Do somethin'!

Thank you.

XOXO!

Bobbi was the resident ~~bitch~~ puppy in Kubulicious™.